13 behaviors that repel men, no matter how pretty you are, according to psychology

I’m not going to lie; beautiful women have a much easier time in the cutthroat dating scene than us mere mortals. But just because the game is rigged in their favor doesn’t mean they always win.

It’s possible to end up permanently single even with the looks of a Greek goddess. If you do any of the following, don’t be surprised if he ends up running despite your great looks, because these are the things that turn guys off the most.

Here are 13 behaviors that drive men away, no matter how beautiful you are:

1. Talking negatively about others

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You know how some people seem to have a permanent rain cloud over their heads? Yes, negativity and depression are contagious.

No one wants to feel bad while dating and even the most positive person will eventually be dragged down by negative nancy friends. If you are constantly depressed, whining and complaining, then don’t be surprised if he slips away.

Complaining can boost one’s ego at the expense of others, a professor at Florida International University writes in Psychology today. Also, unlike connecting people, complaining can tear people apart. When someone is seen as a chronic complainer, other people may not get involved. No one wants to be around someone who complains incessantly.

In general, people want to be around balanced, moderate people. If someone is too bitter or, for that matter, too happy, others tend to avoid them (or, perhaps, complain about them). Another reason people may complain is that the brain has a negative bias.

2. Having poor personal hygiene

man covering his nose sitting next to a smelly woman Prostock-studio | Shutterstock

If you want people to come close to youyou will need to be aware of good personal hygiene: brush your teeth, smell good and present your most hygienic self.

3. Being excessively aggressive

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There are a lot of angry women out there who have been screwed over too many times, and unfortunately many of those ladies will continue to go on dates with men even when they are hot with rage. If a guy sees this, he will usually run in the opposite direction because he thinks the woman in question might be unstable.

You simply cannot have a healthy relationship with a member of a gender you hate or a member of a gender you are bitter towards. If you are so angryit might be time to stop dating.

Research from a 2018 Study Frontiers in Behavioral Neuroscience found that aggression is a complex social behavior with many causes and manifestations. In recent decades, scientists have identified the many forms that aggression can take. Aggression can be physical or verbal.

Harassment can be direct or indirect and can cause reputational damage. It can be impulsive, triggered by anger in response to challenges, or calculated, less emotional and used to achieve another goal.

4. You talk excessively about your ex

bored man on a date with a chatty woman New Africa | Shutterstock

You know how you hate hearing about his ex? Yes, it’s not much different for men either. It’s a sign that it’s still on your mind and that this guy is a comeback and nobody wants that.

5. Presentation of the diva’s behavior

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A common thread among the men I talk to is their distaste for the saying “If you can’t handle me at my worst, you don’t deserve me at my best.” If you think tantrums, demands, causing drama, and making a scene are acceptable, that’s probably why you’re single.

Don’t treat others the way you wouldn’t want to be treated. And if you’re the type to make a scene if you don’t get what you want, you may need to take a break from dating and look at you.

Research from the University of Ottawa (uOttawa) provided a complicated look at young women’s responses to interpersonal conflict. Retaliation is often the response to perceived social rejection and exclusion by other women.

the study, published in Nature’s Scientific Reportshighlights the complicated nature of women’s interpersonal relationships by examining the stress of rejection and whether the personal characteristics of those imposing rejection influence women’s social pain.

6. Constantly checking social media

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Nothing turns men back faster than seeing a woman who is more interested in “looking cool” online and in person than enjoying life. Doing so makes him think he’s just another Instagram prop and makes you look shallow. It doesn’t look good!

7. Not having motivation to try new things

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Most women will regularly admit that they want a guy who has a booming career, is driven and has a rich life to offer. Why wouldn’t guys want something like that?

If you don’t want to do anything, then chances are you can’t contribute anything to a relationship, and that will usually register as a “leech” to most men. Most men want a partner, not a pet.

A Study 2015 Singles in America found the mating preferences of over 5,000 men and women via a survey. Biological researcher and anthropologist Helen Fisher, Ph.D., writes that we’re seeing a “Clooney Effect” in this country—a nod to the recent marriage of America’s favorite bachelor, actor George Clooney, to human rights lawyer Amal Alamuddin.

According to Fisher’s figures, men want smart, strong and successful women; 87% of men said they would date a woman who was more intellectual, more educated and made significantly more money than they did. In comparison, 86% said they were looking a confident and self-assured woman.

8. Using a baby voice

frustrated man rubbing his face Alex Green | Pexels

Yes, surprise, most men are not interested in a baby voice. It doesn’t sound as appealing as you might think, and it is one of the many things that turns guys off.

9. Desperately meeting

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Desperation is something people can smell from a distance and it’s something that drives everyone away. The worst part is that you can’t even hide it. I know it’s hard not to be desperate and try to date, but you need to leave if you feel the desperation creeping in.

Men are often socialized to take emotional responsibility for women, so much so that they often evaluate potential life partners based primarily on how much emotional care they will require. The ideal partner is sometimes described as “low maintenance”, which is like choosing a car because you hope it will require fewer repairs, rather than because you like it and enjoy driving it, psychotherapist Avrum Weiss writes in Psychology today.

10. Being stupid or actually being stupid

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Most guys don’t want to date a girl who is dumb as a brick or pretends to be dumb. The only guys who go after girls who “goof around” are the ones with insecurity issues, control issues, or narcissistic personalities. Don’t do this to yourself – show your wits!

11. Smoking

man covering his nose in disgust Red Stock | Shutterstock

You’d be shocked at how many Guys just won’t date a smoker. It’s gone from a startup to stuff that blows guys away, and it’s easy to see why. It smells funky, makes your breath bad, and also shows that you don’t care about your health.

A 2001 study published on J-STAGE examined how female smokers are perceived by both men and women who have either smoked or never smoked. Participants were shown female models posing with or without a cigarette or simply wearing glasses and rated their perceived intelligence, attractiveness and sensual interest. They found that models who didn’t smoke and didn’t wear glasses were considered the most attractive.

12. Being insecure

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Insecurity is something that will end up eating away at good relationships in many cases. If you can’t handle your insecurities, you may want to wait until you work through the issue before your date. Otherwise, the dating scene will end up chewing you up and spitting you out.

13. Hiding who you are

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Dating is about trying to make a connection. If a guy realizes that you are not being honest about who you are, then he will feel betrayed. It’s lying about who you are, and frankly, doing that is a good way to ruin your chances of a good relationship.

Ossiana Tepfenhart is a writer whose work has been featured in Yahoo, BRIDES, Your Daily Dish, New Theory Magazine and others.