Jeez, three more Lego movies?

Jesus Christ, three more Lego movies? Yes, three additional films about the beloved Danish blockbusters are in development at Universal. Probably riding high on the endless hype surrounding animated Pharrell propaganda, Piece by pieceUniversal and Lego are teaming up for three movies about barefoot’s worst enemy: Lego blocks. Oh, and proving that the Dark Universe isn’t dead, the movies will be live-action.

The names associated with these projects range from the unsurprising to the depressing. First, Jake Kasdan will watch the almost certain success of Red One with a Lego movie with four screenwriters attached. On The Hollywood Reporter, D Train scholars Andrew Mogel and Jarrad Paul will pick up where The pickup writers Matt Rider and Kevin Burrows quit. Previous, Kasdan made such an effective biopic parody that it ruined biopics.

After four years of being shuffled around Warner Bros. and Disney, Patty Jenkins finally has another project, a freaking Lego movie she’s writing with Geoff Johns. Jenkins, who produced one of the few unequivocal hits in the Snyderverse, was rewarded for making one Wonder Woman the sequel people didn’t like with four years of development hell on a Star WARS movie that never happened. To be fair with Wonder Woman 1984it was hard to enjoy anything in December 2020.

Finally, Joe Cornish, the director Attack the block and the understated, utterly charming The child who would be kingwill rewrite Heather Anne Campbell and Simon Rich’s outline for another Lego movie. The names in it are the most interesting. Cornish always seems attached to projects that don’t cross the finish line, such as Snowfall, Starlightand, perhaps most blatantly, a continuation of his escape, Attack the block. Campbell and Rich are two of the best comedy writers in Hollywood, so if we had to put our money down on any of these being worthwhile, this would be it. Maybe we’ll get a new Joe Cornish movie for the first time in five years.

But even so, is this really where we’re headed? Live-action Lego movies? How many fish out of water stories about a Lego man leaving the Lego world can a studio make? Now that superhero movies are no longer a safe bet, Universal wants to make Warner Animation’s mistake of producing more Lego movies than anyone could reasonably want. I learned nothing from Ninjago? Nothing from Playmobil: The Movie? This is indeed a dark Universe.